The 5 love languages are five different ways of expressing and receiving love. What makes one person feel loved isn’t always the same for their partner. Every person demonstrates, understands and receives love in a specific language. In relationships, it is essential to learn the emotional currency of the person we hold dear and identify their love language as part of it. When we know what another person’s love language is, we can choose the gestures that will most resonate with our partner, friend, parent or child. We feel loved when we recognise the actions that speak to us.
What are these 5 different love languages? Knowing your partner’s main love language and applying that language regularly can create a better understanding of each other’s needs.
Words of Affirmation – people with this love language need to hear their partner say “I love you” and give them compliments. This includes leaving your partner a voice message, or a written note or talking to them directly with sincere words of kindness and affirmation.
Another affirmation saying can be: “thank you”, “that was nice of you” or “I appreciate what you did”. “That dress looks incredible on you”, “you always make me laugh”.
Quality Time – this language is all about giving your partner your undivided attention. This is about being together, paying attention to each other, sharing something meaningful and listening and communicating. That means no TV, no chores, no mobile phone or any other distractions.
Other examples include: preparing a meal together, while talking and eating together, sharing plans for the future, making love, or creating something together.
Gift Giving – this person thrives on the love, thoughtfulness and effort behind the gift. The act of choosing and giving a gift that shows you know and understand your partner, and you care enough to think about him/her. A gift can be a bunch of her favourite flowers … the key is to give meaningful things that matter to them and reflect their values and not yours. It’s not about how expensive is the gift but the symbolic thought behind the item.
Acts of Service – this language expresses itself by doing things that you know your partner would like, or to make life easier for him/her. Actions speak louder than words. For example, vacuuming or grocery shopping, making breakfast in bed or walking the dog to demonstrate you care about your partner and your life together. You go out of your way to make your partner feels valued.
Physical Touch – people with this love language thrive on any kind of physical affection: a kiss, hold hand, hugs and pats on the back, touching their arm or hand during a conversation; offering to give a neck or back rub. Physical touch is the most direct way to communicate love, it calms, heals and reassures. Physical intimacy can serve as a powerful emotional connector for your partner.
It’s worth remembering, not everyone expresses their love in the same way, so being aware of the different love languages can help you better understand your relationships